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Alcoholism: What To Do If One Of Your Parents Is Addicted To Alcohol
Dec 31, 2021

Alcoholism: What To Do If One Of Your Parents Is Addicted To Alcohol

When a parent is abusing alcohol, the whole family becomes affected. Whether you are a young child, teenager, or adult child living in the family home, alcoholic parents can have a huge impact on your life. Constantly worrying about your parent’s health, safety, and behavior is emotionally exhausting and heartbreaking to deal with.

If your mother or father is struggling with alcoholism, you may be wondering what you can do to help them. Oftentimes, the children of alcoholic parents become the caretaker and, unintentionally, the enabler of their parent’s addiction. With that being said, let’s take a look at how to tell if your parent is an alcoholic and what you can do if they are addicted to alcohol.

How To Tell If Your Parent Is An Alcoholic

Alcoholism is different for everyone. While some people might show obvious signs of an alcohol addiction, other individuals might hide their alcohol consumption. However, there are a few red flags to watch out for if you think your parent is an alcoholic.

How To Tell If Your Parent Is An Alcoholic

The Most Common Signs Of Alcoholism In Parents Include:

  • Lapses of memory and frequent blackouts
  • Rapid mood swings and irritability
  • Coming up with excuses for alcohol consumption
  • Rationalizing bad behavior that stems from being under the influence
  • Prioritizing drinking and neglecting daily responsibilities
  • Trying to push responsibilities onto other family members
  • Isolating from friends and family members
  • Dealing with financial consequences
  • Drinking alone or drinking in secret to avoid confrontation about their alcohol use
  • Experiencing frequent hangovers
  • Sudden changes in appearance, behavior, and the company they keep

If you are worried about your parent’s alcohol abuse, knowing what to do can be difficult. Your parent may have shifted from an attentive mom or dad to someone you now take care of and make excuses for.  Thankfully, recovery coaches can help you and your parent navigate recovery from alcoholism.

Dealing With An Alcoholic Parent

One of the most important things to remember when dealing with an alcoholic parent is that it’s not your fault. It is common to feel as if they are drinking because of something you did, however, this is never the case. Alcoholism stems from inner conflict, meaning your parent is most likely struggling from a mental health condition or unresolved trauma. Because of this, alcoholism must be treated by a professional recovery coach.

Let’s take a look at what you can do to help your alcoholic parent recover from alcohol use disorder.

Approaching The Conversation

You may want to have a conversation with your parent regarding their alcoholism. While confronting them about their problem with alcohol is important, you must support your loved ones to recovery from addiction. When a parent is approached by their child regarding such a sensitive topic, they may become defensive due to feelings of shame or guilt. However, there are a few ways to keep the conversation supportive, rather than accusatory.

When Speaking With Your Parent About Their Alcoholism, Make Sure To:

  • Use “I” statements
  • Speak in a calm and loving tone
  • Avoid using words such as “alcoholic” or “addict” and stick to positive language
  • Choose an appropriate time and place (somewhere private and safe)
  • Focus on offering solution-based advice
  • Create healthy boundaries and make it clear that you will not put up with their drinking in a respectful manner

Consulting With An Intervention Specialist

If your parent is in denial regarding their issues with alcohol, it may be time to consider hosting an intervention. Intervention specialists can help your family facilitate a healthy and positive discussion surrounding your parent’s alcoholism. The goal of an intervention is to convince the alcoholic individual that they need professional help for their alcoholism.

Consulting with Intervention Specialist

The intervention specialist will help each member of the family write statements to read for the alcoholic parent. These statements should outline the harm that the individual’s alcoholism has caused to the family. Additionally, each family member will outline their boundaries regarding their parent’s alcoholism. You should always stick to your boundaries, even if this means cutting off contact from your parent until they accept help from a professional recovery guide.

Working With A Sober Coach

Sober coaches are great tools for recovering from the disease of addiction. They can help your parent uncover the causes of their alcoholism, provide healing to the entire family, and give referrals to reputable alcohol rehab programs.

Many sober coaches work with the entire family, using a substance abuse recovery approach known as Structured Family Recovery. This form of family addiction therapy helps address issues such as enabling, miscommunication, failure to launch, and much more. If your parent is suffering from alcoholism, a sober coach can teach them how to live a healthy and alcohol-free lifestyle.

Get Connected With A Recovery Guide Today

Michael Herbert, The Recovery Guide, has more than 30 years of experience working closely with individuals and families dealing with addiction and recovery issues. He is a seasoned Coach and can help you and your family establish long-term goals and access the tools you need for continued abstinence and recovery for the entire family. Get in touch with Michael today at 561-221-7677 to schedule an appointment.